Dear Chubbo Wubbo,
I read an article online today asking ‘what would you say in a letter to the love of your first relationship?’ I thought about it and it made me smirk. It made me reflect back on our past and I find it funny that in high school we were in a one year relationship that no one knew about. Well almost no one….with the exception of Blanca and Maggie. Guess we have them to thank for everything that transpired. It was that Truth or Dare game that started it all. Or was it that Taco Bell outing…..? I can’t recall what happened first, but all I know is that when we locked eyes, I knew that that was it for me.
I was in 9th grade and you were in 10th. Although it was probably puppy love, it was love -in the young high school teenage aspect of the word. You will always be my first in ALMOST everything that is expected in a relationship. I grew and got to really know a lot more of myself in that year. Being young and adventurous with what little we could do really was something. Some creativity took place too, I might add. Ahh, the memories.
More that a decade has passed us by and our contact is very minimal, almost non existent to be honest. Although we don’t talk, we still maintain some form of contact through social media; liking each other’s pictures and yearly happy birthday messages.
You found love, are in a long term relationship and he seems to make you really happy, and that makes me happy for you because you deserve it, you truly do. I hope I’m lucky enough to one day find what you have found in him with someone.
I guess what I’m trying to say is thanks. It was my first real relationship and it opened my eyes to a lot of things; specifically learning a lot more about myself as an individual. Granted, it took me years to acknowledge over half of them, but better late than never, right? Thanks for helping me find myself, for teaching me that I was unique and special, that I was always loved and that I mattered to you in this crazy world. I don’t know if you know this, but I appreciated it then, and I still appreciate it now. I never took that for granted. I may not have showed it back then, but over a decade later, I realize that that time I spent with you helped set the foundation for many things in my life. That’s something that can never be taken away, not ever and I’ll always be greatful for the time I had with you.
I’m proud of the confidence I worked hard for and finally got. It feels good to love yourself and not care what people say. Owning your flaws and knowing what you need to work on is such a good feeling. I’m not looking at the past anymore. I feel good with who I am right this moment.